Outta Here!

And I am off to Summit! I'm sure you already know.....but I will be unable to post during my trip. 

However.  I will probably take some pictures on my phone and text them to my mom....in which case she will probably post them on her blog (click here).

Be back on the 1st!  Have a wonderful few weeks, everyone!

(And by the way....have you noticed that I just hopped over the #400 mark for posts?  Yep! This post is #402. But don't congratulate me.  It's only taken me three and a half years to get here. :-)

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The Last Few Days I Have Been.....

 racking my brain, trying to think of what I'll most likely forget to pack   //    wondering if my last tube of mascara will last me or if I should buy a new one just in case    //    charging all electronics    //  cleaning my room and bathroom within an inch of its' life so both are clean upon return    //    having sympathy for those with arthiritis (thank you tetanus shot in my very sore arm)    //    un-plugging our shower drain, which was hugely clogged by my rapidly shedding hair (I could sell wigs with what I've lost)........

.....re-doing all nails before departure    //    remembering not to pack nail clippers as they are deadly weapons as far as TSA is concerned   //   spending 45 minutes creating a paper-plate race track with two excited brothers   //    making chocolate chip cookies   //   preparing the house for our 7am waffle breakfast with friends tomorrow   //   figuring out how much spending money to bring   //   laughing when I woke up at 2am and hearing my dog whining in his sleep next to my bed (bad dream?)  //   reminding Isaac again to pull up his pants before exiting the bathroom, not after......

And I could go on and on and on.   I am so excited for my approaching trip - two more days until

bon voyage!

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Summit Ministries Promo Video

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Awkward and Awesome Wednesday

Awkward:  

~purchasing prenatal vitamins at Fry's today.   No joke!  The doctor said my hair loss may be related to low iron (kind of figured that) so he recommended taking a prenatal vitamin every day.  I felt like I should be one of those radiant first-timer-expectant mothers, waltzing through the store and buying mama-pills - in reality I'm just a 19-year old unmarried-non-pregnant-yet-losing-hair-at-an-alarming-rate girl.  In need of higher iron levels.  Hence the prenatal vitamin.

~being told (again) that I look 16.  The ladies at the CPC (very wonderful ladies that they are) were shocked that I was 19.  I'm not surprised.  Kind of used to that reaction by now though.

~ getting a sucker at the doctor's office this morning after receiving a tetanus shot and having blood drawn.  I felt like a five-year-old.  Again, in reality it was for my blood sugar levels (I always pass out with needles), not because of good behavior.  Though I was a good girl.  :-)

 
 Awesome:

~ the fact that my trip to Summit is just three days away!  I'm beginning the packing process....did two loads of my own laundry today and am trying to figure out what to bring.  There's so much I'm going to need for two weeks...."packing light" is almost impossible for a girl! :-)

~ Kix cereal.  Love that stuff.   For breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack, midnight snack, 2:00 am snack, you name it, it's good anytime.  (And yes I've done both the midnight and the 2:00 am snack before, many times.  It's just......me.  I'm always hungry.)

~ Cleaning and washing and scrubbing our kitchen/living room/family room last night for a few hours.  It was in shambles (I do mean shambles) and I had had a very stressful day (or week, or year, whatev).  Cleaning RELIEVES stress for me.  Seriously.  It was just what I needed!! Listening to Chip Ingram's messages on my ipod, scrubbing a million dishes by hand, and watching a large thunderstorm roll in made for an awesome evening last night for me.

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A Good Laugh

Little things make me laugh. 

It's just the way I am.   Hearing good news (even something small) or watching something funny can brighten my day. 

So, what did last week find me doing?  *Gulp*

Uh, watching scenes from the movie Bambi on youtube.  We ditched our broken VHS copy ages ago.  But something triggered my memory the other day and made me race inside and look up that part where Thumper gets his girlfriend - or rather, is found by her and completely twitterpated.

I could watch this a dozen times.  (I have.)  It just makes me chuckle.  And it sure brings back memories of watching this countless times when I was little.  :-)

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My Day

 Today found me very, very busy.  

5:45 am - wake up wishing I hadn't.  Getting to bed at 11 pm due to church night and waking up with chirping crickets is never a good idea.  To no avail - my body has its' own alarm clock so I was ready to go for the day.

6:30 - apply female warpaint after an invigorating shower. Do hair and put salve on recovering ingrown toenail.

7:15 - Eat Special K cereal with five year old brother, eating his beloved congee.   Tell him I'm headed to the Crisis Pregnancy Center for the morning and be flabbergasted when he chirps back, "Yeah, you help mamas not kill their babys, pow pow!"  (Insert scrunched up face and lion roar.)  WHERE did he get that??!!

  

 9:00 - arrive at the CPC.  Continue to be trained by the very dear ladies that work there.....enjoy coffee (and a donut that I shouldn't have had)....sort a big box of the most adorable baby girl clothes...learn how to do the pregnancy tests.....love being around the wonderful women there!  They are so sweet and godly.

3:00  - head over to our pastor's house to pickup David, who spent the day doing battle with other guys at our church via Axis and Allies.  There was war - and Pirates of the Caribbean music playing - and cookies - and at the end of it all, a brother with a 100* fever.  Yep.  We went home. :-)  He's been sleeping on his bed ever since.

4:00 - dry a million dishes that Mom washed by hand due to a broken dishwasher.  Isn't that lovely when you have eight dish-dirtiers?!:-)

5:00 - eat dinner (leftovers) and give in to Isaac's plea for a slice of green pepper.  That's our Isaac.....he would eat a raw onion if we'd let him!  He LOVES anything fresh and raw.  Potatoes, lettuce, carrots, celery, pepper (any color but orange is preferable)....

Now - typing up this blog post.  (By the way that photo above was taken on my phone....that's why it's poor quality. :-)  But it was on the way to church, and it was cute.  

Tonight, we seem to have ice cream on the schedule....perhaps an Andy Griffith?, some last-minute family time with Courtney before she leaves for Alabama tomorrow, a possible Skype session with a very dear friend, and probably going to sleep listening to whatever's on my ipod - Chip Ingram (love his messages), and a whole huge hodge-podge of worship music.

Another day.  A good day.  And tomorrow?  

More of the same.....including the female-warpaint bit and probably another hilarious conversation with one of my little brothers.  :-)  Ah, life.

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When Life Gets You Down

I hope I'm not alone in saying that life can really get me down sometimes.  Seriously.

And though you may not believe that, because after all, this girl Rachel with the cute blog and nice pictures and wonderful looking family looks perfect, right?  Sorry, but behind my thick concrete blog -wall, plastered with colorful pictures and updates on my "perfect" life, lies an imperfect girl with a boatload of issues - everything from bad hair days to yelling at my siblings to crying in my bed to feeling un-important to failing to be the sister I need to be.....and all those little things like ingrown toenails and pimples and stomach-aches.......and I could go on.

I have problems - and my life is not perfect.  Our family has quite a few issues going on right now (which I won't disclose on this blog) but needless to say, we're far from perfect.  Far. (Did I say far?)

I get discouraged.  I feel so many things - anxious, afraid, dismal, angry, frustrated, cranky, disheartened...even depressed sometimes.  I have hard days.  I have days where I fall down and believe the lies that Satan bombards me with.  I lose sight of the truth and think, what's the point of all this anyway?  I start thinking I'm alone....that maybe God doesn't care.  I look down and stare at my pain, blowing it way out of porpotion until it looks much bigger than my true Love.

And do you know what?  When I believe all that, I've succumbed to Satan.  I've allowed him to gain a foothold in my heart.  And things don't get better from there - they get worse.  Dark clouds only get darker.  I sink farther into despair.

It's when I'm at my lowest that I've learned to pull myself up by my spiritual bootstraps, and, no matter how bad I feel, I look UP.   When the torrents of depressing thoughts come rolling in, I literally have to just shut my mind to all that and focus on my Saviour.  And while reading verses that apply to my situation is sometimes helpful, I have found that the best way out of the pit is to just fix my heart on Jesus.  To remember Who He is to me - and who I am to Him.  No matter what's going on, I strive to block that out and think on how awesome He is, how I'll never be able to fathom how enormous His love is for me.  How crazy He is about me...even down to the little details.   I've told God over and over how much I love rainstorms and cloudy days - so when they come I just feel like He's smiling down on me. 

I feel like we, as second generation Christians, have totally forgotten how personal God is.  I forget that when God says He loves me, He really means He loves ME.  Not as just another human in the masses, like a herd of cattle, but individually, as His very own child.  When He promises that His strength is made perfect in my weakness, He's dead serious.  He really means it.  I am His, and He is mine.

So I sit and journal how great my Savior is.  I just read Scriptures that talk about God's incredible love for me, and His sovereignty in my life......I listen to heart-stirring worship songs.  I sit in His presence and just soak up what I lack.

And then?  Yes, the problems remain.  Yes, the pain is still there.  But it's diffused.  Making room for Him in my heart, instead of letting my fears reign, sheds a whole new light on the issues I have.  And I can go on - with Him.  He makes it easier somehow.  It's one of those un-explainable things.....but when life gets me down, the only remedy is for me to look up.  It works. 

Because He works. 

Just wanted to share that with you all.....I don't know what you're going through, but know that you are not alone.  We all have problems.  We're a broken people.  Messed up, twisted around, confused, you name it.  But that's why we need Him.  Whatever's going on with you, just know that God is so FOR you and loves you to death...literally.  Bask in that. Let Him in your life - perhaps more than you have before.  You need Him. :-)

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Courtney's Last Days

The countdown has begun.....two more days until Courtney leaves.  :-(  Yesterday, half the family was gone (recruiter's office / Costco run), so Courtney, David, and I decided to make one of our last afternoons a fun one.  I needed to go to Target anyway, so we hit that place first and then went on to the movies!

You'll notice that we WERE at Target....check out those authentic Target shopping carts. :-)  Target always has great clearance stuff, so I got a Maxi skirt (been looking for just the right one forever) and a really cute top.  Courtney had to grab some last minute things for her dorm.

Poor David endured the shopping half of it.....he got drug to Sally's Beauty Supply for a while, but he did manage to come out alive.  :-)  Then we headed to the theater just across the street to see Ice Age: Continental Drift.  I think he liked that part!  It was a cute movie, and I was surprised at the strong recurring theme of family being most important throughout the entire thing.  It also was slightly....um,....well, dumb - (I have this pet peeve with cartoons that go way over the top in the dramatic department)....but other than that it was clean, frought with humor (a little too much in my opinion, lol!), and sprinkled with some wholesome morals. 

Worth the $7?  Well, uh, probably not.  I don't know, maybe so. I'm a horribly cheap person...to a fault.   Mostly it was fun to just do something together as a "kid trio" - making the most of our last weekend together as a family.  Mom has some amazing meals planned for this weekend.....a grillout, hopefully some good family time in there.  Should be good, and I'll try to remember to take pictures.  :-)

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That's My Boy

Have I ever mentioned before how Isaac is our, um, well.....dynamic child?  Like, very full of personality?   And maybe a little too much spunk?

It's this kind of spunk that makes him say things like, "I beg yours bardon?" when he's on the verge of tears.  Makes him bubble over with un-anticipated excitement over little things like going to Wal-Mart or making cookies.  Makes him sing his little heart out when I'm playing "You Are My All In All" on the piano - and makes him get all the words right, (with his own little twist on the pronounciation, of course).

He can certainly be....uh, sour at times...this face is definitely a familiar sight.  But wowzie, he can be quite the charmer as well.  Recently the thing that makes him laugh is that little part in Bambi, where Thumper is just about ready to chow down on the blossoms, and his mother makes him qoute his father's daily admonition:  Eating greens is a special treat, it makes long ears and great big feet!"  That always gets a chuckle out of him.  :-)

 

His first tooth is loose. He's the ever rightous-older-brother.  Tells me, "I'm not going to do that, I won't be a copycat like Josh."  (Which Joshua is, big time.)  And it's true. He's very original.   And besides his obsession with the color orange (check out the shirt), he's not picky about much in life....eats everything, loves to play anything.   BUT he thrives on routine.  A simple thing like re-arranging the seating order at the table will upset his entire day. 

How can he be getting so big?  Argh!  Glad I captured this time in his life through photos.  Priceless.

Love you, Ise.  (And yeah, like it or not, that's his nickname.  I know calling him a body part sounds weird but that is just what sticks, lol!)

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The Baby of the Family

 Holla!  After yesterday I was rather in the picture-taking mood this afternoon.....so it was off to the park again for another photo shoot.  Thankfully I have a very willing victim model in Josh so he was great with posing for me.  He is so incredibly photogenic so it was easy to grab these great shots of him.  He didn't seem to mind that it was a steamer outside, or that the grass was scratchy, or that flies were buzzing around us.  (Only Isaac minded - he'll be another post.) 

 I'm glad that Asian genetics have made it into the Krause lines, lol!  So, so handsome! Flawless skin, thick hair, gorgeous eyes...yep, good breeding stock!  (I'm kidding, for those of you who are offended:-)

My sweet Josh is growing up so fast.....he's already doing preschool work!  He can spell his name, knows his alphabet, sings incredibly well, and gives great kisses and hugs.  I love how he is so self-entertaining; he is content to read or play quietly for hours, literally.  And he has a smile that lights up his whole face. 

Notice the cute cowboy boots?  Thought he'd never get big enough for them.  And now here he is, a big guy, wearing big briefs and staying dry at night (BIG accomplishment around here!). 

Love this guy!  Much to my dismay he is growing too old to fulfill my dreams of having a lucrative Huggies diaper modeling career.  *Sigh* Ah well.  What a dear anyway....what do you think of the pictures?

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You've Got 2B Kidding Me.....

Remember my post about this *amazing* mousse hair product about a week ago?  I actually starting using it several weeks ago.  Thought it was doing wonders.

Now I wished I never used it.  Seriously. 

The last several weeks I have been losing more hair than I ever have before.....gobs and gobs (way more than is normal). Figured it was just one of those things that would pass with time.   But then I'm thinking, what have I been doing differently? 

Been using this mousse, and blow drying my hair upside down.  Is this what's causing my abnormal hair loss?  Not joking, I think I've lost a 1/3 of my hair....even my mom is telling me that it looks way thinner now.  NO!!!  Every time I turn around another wad comes out - it's everywhere!  I'm slightly panicking here. 

But maybe it's not the mousse.  Stress?  Hormone imbalance?  All of the above?

Needless to say, all mousse, sprays, and styling are coming to a screeching halt until I get this under control.  I've got to figure out what is going on with my poor scalp....I canNOT afford to lose any more hair!  I feel like I'm having one of those bad dreams where I *accidentally* cut off all my hair - but then of course sweet relief washes over me when I wake up and find all my hair. 

But I'm not waking up this time......any suggestions?!  God has all the hairs of my head numbered - but He must be aware that they've been severely depleted as of late.  What fun, adjusting to half the hair I used to have.  :-(

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The First Goodbye

It's happened - the nest is beginning to empty.  My sister Courtney received a full scholarship to UAH (University of Alabama Huntsville) and has accepted it.  She will be majoring in business. I have to say I was slightly unprepared for this turn of events, but way to go sis! 

Last minute plans are being made, packing has started, and she's gearing up to leave for Alabama in just a week.  Wow.  Hard to believe that soon I will be not only the oldest, but also the only girl in the house.  And my own room.   And my own bathroom.   (Pros and cons there, as you can imagine.)   I will definitely miss her - it's going to be totally different once she leaves.  She's madly making lists for her dorm life to come - suitcases are out, clothes are getting packed. 

As my post title says, it's only the first of several goodbyes yet to come.  Jonathan's Navy aspirations are finally coming together, and I will update you all on that later next week.  And me?  Well as you can remember from this post, I'm headed off to a Summit Ministries conference for two weeks.....in just another....well, two weeks, basically!

This will be a very interesting and emotional few weeks for all of us....at least for me, anyway. I don't like change, I'm a homebody, and this turn of events is going to be slightly rough for me!  But all in God's plan......updates to come as they happen.  :-)

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Bro/Sis Photo Shoot

So....it all started with wanting to be published on Fresh Modesty's Friday posts.  I wanted to (and still intend to) submit photos of a favorite outfit to be published on my *bestest* fashion blog.  :-)  I actually wore this outfit to church yesterday and didn't have time to take photos.  But today on the spur of the moment, Jonathan and I headed to a nearby park to do a double photo shoot - something we've actually never done before!  Courtney usually takes all my photos so I didn't think Jonathan would do very well.  But I was pleasantly surprised. :-) 

Wish this one wasn't so blurry....

I love doing photo shoots like this, but to be honest, I have to say that I feel rather fake posting the pics. :-)  Seriously, I don't look like this on an every day basis.  I have horrible, horrible hair days.  And I don't get to prance around in heels or jewels all day long.  Just so ya know.....

In fact, just the other day I was bemoaning to my Dad his passing on the wretched genetics of straight hair.....seriously curly hair has always seemed more usable to me.  My mom just laughs and tells me she would have given away all of her limbs to have had my hair when she was younger.  (To which I say the grass is always greener on the other side.  Always.)

To which I say, I need to be thankful for the way God has made me....we all do.  There are so many things I could complain about regarding my looks, but what's the point?  Really, it seems like the most beautiful girls I know are usually the ones that think they are the ugliest on earth.   Besides, I'm not living under the media spotlight - I'm living for an Audience of One and He's the One who made me anyway.....so that's all that matters, right? 

Okey-doke, so now on to my handsome brother. 

We both tried pulling off the contemplative look, and though both of us had a ton of horrible pics to show for it, this one was a good one for him.  Maybe it's just guys.  Looking dumbly into a camera lense seems more macho than girly.

 And now he smiles. :-)

Years ago, before height got involved, people used to think we were twins.  I personally thought we looked like twins.  But now?  Not so much.  He gets the "you look

like 25" and I get the "how old is your little sister".  Yep.  Been told I look 16.  That was encouraging.

So....what can I say about this guy?  For one thing he has a great tan.  Likely he'll be making numerous trips to the dermotologist in future years...lol!  But for now who cares.  :-)

Does he look like me?  Do we even look related?  Maybe I was secretly adopted. Or accidentally swapped at birth with another baby at the hospital nursery. I don't think I look like anybody (except for Jonathan).  

As we drove to the park I kept thinking of that phrase from numerous Andy Griffith episodes, "You look good enough to take to a picture show!"  Haha....yep, it took about ten minutes to get duded up for a 20 minute photo shoot....but it was fun.  Thanks Jonathan for taking my half of the pictures!

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